1. Prepare for lethargy by drinking too much wine the night before.
2. Hide his ukulele.
3. Strategize what to eat first from the three bags full of groceries brought home by boyfriend.
4. Have cookies for lunch, followed by after-lunch cookies.
5. Put off watching the latest episode of “Jersey Shore” (aka the dangling carrot) as long as possible.
6. Waste 10 minutes discussing who should go out for more cookies before it’s too late, only to succumb to laziness brought on by full-cookie tummy.
7. Watch “Jersey Shore.”
9. Come up with ideas for revising the 48-hour, anti-climatic storm coverage, broadcast on every single network channel. For example, turn it into an extended “Saturday Night Live”/Letterman-type extravaganza, hosted by Joan Rivers, John Stewart or Busta Rhymes or some combination there-of, with musical guests and improv bits—relegating all reporter-on-the-street-in-the-rain coverage to ten minutes per hour, maximum, which is then made fun of by Rivers and company.
10. Eat half a bag of chips and salsa.
11. Formalize #10 and make nachos for dinner.
12. Spend 20 minutes trying to agree on something to watch on Netflix Instant.
13. Repeat #12 every hour-and-a-half to two hours.
14. With hangover diminished but not to the point where the six-pack in the fridge looks alluring, fall asleep on the couch by 9:30.
15. Go in for extended morning snuggling.
16. Go in for extended morning (i.e. not workday morning) foreplay.
17. Make like Kool and the Gang, and get down on it.
18. Eat breakfast in phases: 1) coffee; 2) eggs, english muffin, more coffee; 3) banana.
19. Laugh at farts.
20. Remember and delight in the propelling action made by toenails being clipped, as several strays accidentally (then purposely) fly into boyfriend’s lap. Then watch un-amusement wash over his face.
21. Successfully convince boyfriend to help clean the apartment.
22. Unsuccessfully convince boyfriend to clean out the spare closet.
23. Send each other emailed photos of creepy animals while indulging in mutual laptopping.
24. Listen to the quiet of “the eye.”
25. When Bloomberg finally declares us free from our cages, become both overwhelmed with possibilities—go for a run? or for a bodega run to make mimosas?—and disappointed that the forced staycation is over without having had the chance to beat boyfriend at Scrabble.